There is a real monster inside of me that is hard to love.
She follows me around as my shadowy self
Showing up on even the brightest, sunniest moments
She is impulsive
She is selfish
She worries, endlessly, about the things that she cannot control
She gets irritable and frustrated at those she loves the most
But yet
All she wants is my attention
She wants to be acknowledged and loved
Despite her dark feelings
She wants me to know that her feelings of anger matter
And that she doesn't want to be angry but that she deeply feels
The pain of the World
And Others
She desires to feel metta
And to be deeply heard
And understood
By Me.
When this happens,
Then she will
Be free
And whole
Inside of me.
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